Wibbling Thoughts

Last night i went to my first ever Martyn Joseph concent with Annie P and Tom Day from the ship. It was amazing. So i will now spend several paragraphs gushing about one of the most wonderful concerts i have ever been to (not that i’ve been to many concerts)

We had to stand outside in the cold for quite a while before getting let into the building and nabbing three seats in the last row. The last row was about 3 meters from the stage where MJ was playing. The concert began with serveral songs i didn’t recognise and i began to wonder why i had been told to go to a live gig…About half way into the first half MJ began playing songs i recognised and a few people were singing along. Gradually the audience singing got louder with encouragement from MJ and the first half ended with a long story in the middle of a song (i think it was hang the world).

We had a drink and i found some church friends who knew martyn joseph and i stood with my mouth open for several minuets after finding out that they were his friends (i’ve not lost my “wow – famous christian :notworthy:” attitude to people who play or write or sing although it’s not as bad as it was). Then the second half started. Again, the singing got louder until in one song (lets talk about it in the morning IIRC) Martyn stepped back from the mike and let the audience sing the song. All of the song. Until the instrumental (which we tried to sing anyway). It went from there really. Because we were in a reasnoblaly small room it was quite easy for people to hear that others were singing and so they joined in. MJ also did Liberal Backslider, which is one of my favourite songs, and the line that was the loudest and sang with most passion was:

gonna take me a TV evangelist and punch him in the face

the last song (before the encore) was called whoever brought me here will have to take me home. And was amazing. Really really really really amazing. The encore was Aching and Longing (audience sung) and Sum of all these parts, which MJ went on another tangent on. The most easily rememberd lines of the tangent were: “it’s 11.02 and is past the curfew but it doesn’t matter as i’m singing quietly” and “i need to get back to the minor key again”

It really was a wonderful concert. I can’t wait to see him again!

After the concert i went a talked to MJ and asked if i could use some of his song lyrics for my photography project (which has to be in two weeks today) and he said yes . so i’m now picking out sound bites from songs to put in my project, which means i have 4 people who have been asked (Wood, Mike Riddell, Sue Wallace and Martyn Joseph) and only one who can sue me (C.S. Lewis).

yay

untitled

that night i felt your touch again

when you took me in your arms

and promised to be live and well

but morning brought a storm

confusion rained in april showers

when the sense of loss poured down

until the understanding dawned

that i’d never see you again.

the merchant flag covered my hope

as the fire blazed bright gold

and coldness stilled my beating heart

and i looked out and never cried

now i see your sun tanned face

against a bright blue devon sea

laughing smiling joking with me

and i miss you.

It’s a pretty crap poem really. Doesnt really say what i want it to say and doesn’t say what i don’t want it to say very well. But it holds some memories – that’s all that’s left now.

‘Nother song, depressing again. (i can’t right music so this is just lyrics)

The raadio played your song last night

and with the memory of you in my eyes

hearing you laugh and call my name

wishing you’d always be there

but the ship sailed away before i knew what i’d lost

and conway gulls flew in the sky

and suddely shining bright in the darkness

i heard my voice shout goodbye

the sun shines throught the grey clouds golden bright

you whisper to me that you love me

my heart chokes i find i cannot replay

buy you hear my heart cry out i love you

golden fields of amber grain

the bright blue devon sea

a promise made and shared and broken

living in the memory

and i sit and i think of the times we had

all the songs we used to sing

thought the days have brought our parting ways

wonder memories cannot die

the radio plays her songs again

and i’m reminded of loved and lost

bitersweet rhythms are breaking my heart

as it cries out to the darkness i love you

That’s it for now. I wrote both of them ages ago….more recent stuff may come tommorrow (ie.when i’ve deciphered it)

Travelled to Durham today to meet the tombs which was lovely and spent most of the day missing my dad which was hell. The hell of missing dad wasn’t helped by several facts. One was that I was with a family, which is normally fine and dandy and wonderful but was a bit upseting tonight, two was that the reading at evensong was the revelations one, he will wipe away every tear from their eyes and three was the fact i found a poem i wrote in my note book.

I realised something else today too. It’s about college and failing last year. It’s “easy” now to say in a half joking way “i screwed up last year” or “i failed a year” or somthing like that….but inside it hurts like hell. Everyso often i realise what i did last year, what happened and see how stupid i am and how i’ve let everyone down. Im at that time now.

And the two things are connected. Two people who believed in me are with god. and i miss both of them like hell, but i feel like i have let them down.

I’m sure i will be more cheerful tommorrow. but tonight is now and it stinks.

I may post my poem and a couple of other bits up when i’m in my bedroom (instead of the studio)

Gambit mentioned that it was right to protest and i agree. It was right to protest. But i would still have appriciated knowing what was going on. And silent protests are very powerful but an organisational nightmare.

Occupying a couple of roads would have been fun though.

I think it was important to make the our voices heard and to show both governments that the opposition to war is still there and won’t just go away if it’s ignored.

The experience of such a large national demo (350 000 according to stop the war and 70 000 according to the police)was interesting and i am glad that i did it even thought being in a crowd was kinda scary at the time (i was told by an old friend from Cell in Manchester who is now at uni in York that i am stronger than i give myself credit for…)

On a spiritual note, I thought i had lost the passion i once had for and in events like Message 2000 and Soul Survivor and He@t, but now i’m not so sure…In talking to Dave (friend who is now at york) the subject of Greenbelt came up and I told him about it and Visions. With a passion i thought i had lost. He was also very jealous that i have me the Rev. Gerald and he hadn’t

I got up at 6.30 and left the house at 7 to get on the coach by 8. then i sat in a coach for 4 or 5 hours, stood in a very packed square for 1 hour, marched for about 2 hours, gave up attempting to get into trafalgar square for the rally and went to get some food and find the coach. then it was back on the coach for another 4 hours.

So, in view of all the time i spent with people shouting and even being silent WHY THE HELL DID NO ONE MENTION THE FACT THAT THERE WERE PEOPLE DYING IN TURKEY? Yes, i am rather upset about this. I am passionately anti-war, have been for a long time but if there are people dying in a terrorist attack aimed at my country then i can think of many places where i would rather have been. Even doing such puny worthless things like saying a prayer or lighting a candle, joining a vigil, having a silence. But no, the word didn’t get passed around the demo that people were dying .

I believe i have the right to protest, but there are some times when protests shouldn’t happen. Yesterday after the bombings in turkey was (IMHO) one of them.

It rained.

And we marched and shouted. But we didn’t sit down in the middle of a road, which was a shame really. The one thing that was odd was walking round york shouting chants at the top of my voice and bumping into my history teacher. who was also shouting chants. it felt odd

I’m excited about tommorrow though, my first national demo and i’m meeting Gambit and possibly Dave C in london

should be fun

I finally have something vaugully interesting to write about!

Tommorrow i am heading down to London to ‘welcome’ Mr. Bush in to the country. The coach leaves York (the opposite side of the city to where i am based) at 8am. Great. As the demo is in college time i asked permision to skive my history lesson (my only lesson on a thursday) and surprisingly it was granted, i love having a raging socialist for a teacher

Last night i had a really vivid nightmare. That i had just woken up and looked at the clock and it was 8.02 and couldn’t work out what day it was. I got up and ran downstairs before i realised it was a dream. I’m still confused about what day it is…

Tonight i will be shouting about Bush in a local demo and then going to a meal at a friends house.

OOOOOH….and i emailed mike riddell about this ( http://www.wibsite.com/wibblethorpe/quote.htm ) quote, asking him if i could use it in photography class and he said yes. I also found out that some friends of mine had been staying with him in NewZeland. Scary.